Funny Jokes SMS

Boy:Suit acha pehna he
Girl:Thnx
Boy:lipstik boht achi lagai he
Girl:Thnx
Boy:make up bhi boht acha kiya he
Girl:Thnx bhaiya”
Boy: Sohni fair v nai lagdi pai.

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Funny Jokes Urdu Messages
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Boy : Why
You Did Not
Close Your Eyes
When
I Kisses You ?
.
.
.
.
….
.
Girl : Kaminay .. Last Time Eyes
Close Ki Thein, Tab Tu Ne Mere
Purse
Se 500 Rupy Chura Liye The … =P:)

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Funny Jokes Urdu Messages
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1 admi adhi rat ko apni moti biwi ko jaga k bola
“begum! sisk sisk kr mrna acha he ya 1 dum?”

begum:”1 dum”

admi:”to phir apni dosri taang b mere opr rakh do.”

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Funny Jokes Urdu Messages
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Wife:I will die.
Husband: I will also die.
Wife:why will you die?
Husband:because i cant bear such great happiness.

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Funny Jokes Urdu Messages
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A Man goes to a shop:
“I need a ladies suit..?”
Shopkeeper:
“Sir, Begum kay liye chahiye ya koi achha sa dikhaon?”

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Funny Jokes Urdu Messages
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Logic-
Teacher to student:A=B,B=C, So C=A
Now tell me an example just like that
student:I Love you, you love your daughter then I Love your daughter…….

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Funny Jokes Cute Messages
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A good discussion is like a MINI SKIRT.
Short enough to pertain interest and long enough to cover the subject.

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Funny Jokes Cute Messages
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I love your smile, your face, and your eyes
Damn, I’m good at telling lies!
Kind, intelligent, loving and hot,
This describes everything you are not!

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Funny Jokes Cute Messages
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Hey friend remember that without stupidity there can be no wisdom
&
without ugliness there can be no beauty…
so the world needs YOU after all!

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Funny Jokes Cute Messages
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Husband: How long can a man live without brains?
Wife: I don’t know. How old are you?

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Funny Jokes Cute Messages
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You are ABCD
Attractive beautiful cute dear
EFG
Excellent funny gorgeous
HIJ
Hello I am joking

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Funny Jokes Messages
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Son: ‘ Mom, when I was on bus with Daddy this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady.’
Mom: ‘Well, you have done the right thing.’
Son: ‘But mom, I was sitting in daddy’s lap.’

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Funny Jokes Messages
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From death bed, the husband called his wife and said, “One month
after I die I want you to marry Sam.”

“Sam! But he is your enemy !” “Yes, I know that ! I’ve suffered all
these years so let him suffer now.”

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Funny Jokes Messages
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Sardar ji ( to doctor ) : Doctor, I have a problem.
Doctor : What’s your problem?
Sardar ji : I keep forgetting things.
Doctor : Since when do you have this problem?
Sardar ji : What problem?

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Funny Jokes Messages
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A friend asks sardar how was your exam?
Sardar: It was okey but i couldn’t answer past tense of THINK.
I thought, thought & finally i wrote ‘THUNK’.

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Funny Jokes Messages
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Relationship between lovers in today’s age.
You can touch each other
but you cannot touch each others mobile..

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Pathan: oye teray chotay bhai ki moonchain hen or teri nahi hen?
Aisa kiun?

2nd Pathan: Is main kiun wali kya bat he?
Wo Abu pe gya he or me ammi pe.

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Ho nhi sakta k mujay teri yaad na aye,
bhool k bhi bhulaon wo waqt na aye,

Tum bhulo to tumhen agli sans na aye
Me bhoolun
.
.
.
.
.
.
Chal koi gal nai Banda bhool bhi jata hai…;)

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Judge: Tum teesri baar adalat me aa rhay ho, tumhain sharam nhi ati?

Sardar: Oh janab, tusi roz anday o, tuwanu te fair duub k mar jana chahi da na….

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Aik bona shadi ki raat ko room mein enter hotay hi biwi se bola,
“Chal bakri ban.”

Biwi: ye kya bdtameezi hai?
Bona: bdtameezi nhi!
Kamray ki kundi lagani hai.

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Four guys
1 from Howard:
1 Oxford
1 Texas
&
1 Sardar from Punjab university

1 common question:
What is the fastest thing in world?

Oxford:Light
Howard:Thought
Texas:Blink of an eye
Sardar:It’s loose motions,
because last night I was lying in my bed
& before I could blink,think or turn on the lights,
it was over!

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Phone Ki Ring hui.
Husband: Mere liye Ho To Kehna Mai Ghar pe Nahi Hun.
Wife Phone Utha k : wo ghar pe hain.
Husband: Mana Kiya phr Bhi
Wife : Ji wo mere liye tha

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Teacher: Johny, If Your Father Earned Rs. 100,00,000
And Gave Half Of It To Your Mother,
What Would Your Mother Have?

Little Johny: A Heart attack

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Adab ki inteha!

Mein sirf ye soch kar paper khali de ata hun
Faraz!

K kahin teacherz ye na kahen k agay se jwab deta hai!

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Ek pathan ka school main 7th class main new admission hua .
Teacher: beta batao Allama iqbal kon hain?
Pathan: hum ko kya pata hum to school mai naya aya he….

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Wife was Running After A Garbage Truck:
Am I Too Late 4 The Garbage?

Hubby Following Her Yelled: Not Yet.
Jump in fast darling.

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A wife was kidnapped.
The kidnapper sent a piece of her finger
to her husband & demanded money.
Husband replied:
I want more proofe
MUNDI BEHJO MUNDI…

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When No1 Misses Me,
When No1 Cares 4for me,
When Every one Ignores Me,
Nobody Messages Me,
Then I Sit In A Corner,
Fold My Arms,
&
Say,
“Nai Te Na Sahi”

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sardar to his wife: Darling, years ago you had a figure like Coke bottle.
Banto: Yes darling I still do, only difference is earlier it was 300ml
now it’s 1.5 ltr.

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Husband: Darling you have a horrible thing on your neck . I m really terrified to see it.
Wife(horribly) what’s that?
Husband: Your face.

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Faakay pe faaka ho raha hai,,,

Nakay pe naka ho raha hai,,,

Hakumat kar rahi hai Mansooba bandi,,,

Phir bhi kakay pe kaka ho raha hai…….

Mother, to her teenage daughter,,,,
I think its right time, we should talk about sex….
Daughter: Sure mom, what do you want to know???

Ek Girl:- Hey Bhagwan, Meri Shadi Koi Samajhdar admi Se karwa Do….
Bhagwan:- Ghar Jao Beti Samajhdar Admi Kabhi Shadi Nahin Karte…..

Teacher: who is a terrorist?
Student: terrorist is a tourist who celebrates diwali in our country. …